Don’t ask me how I feel about you,
Because the answer is the same.
I honestly don’t know.
I know that the way I view your personality
Has changed over the years,
Which makes it confusing for me to figure out my feelings.
I don’t think I’ll ever love myself wholeheartedly,
Because if I did, I would have accepted your love.
I never think I deserve that kind of admiration.
Maybe that’s why I can only chase behind those
Who can love me less than I do.
Don’t ask me if there’s any hope,
Because the answer is still the same.
I hope you’ll find someone better
Who can love you the way you deserve to be loved.
I feel like,
I can never allow myself to be with you
Because I think too highly of you.
And I think too little of myself.
When you kiss me,
The sensation hits a chord of confusion.
Shyness takes a hold of me,
Stopping me from looking at your eyes directly,
Afraid of confronting the lack of
Or the existence of intense feelings towards you,
Which forces me to find shelter in the uncertainty
That I’ve wrapped myself with in the past years.
I can’t afford to take the hint
And hold your hand,
Even though I want to
Because its value to you
May be different to what it is to me.
Take me for a night drive.
We’ll take turns with the playlist.
We’ll listen in silence.
I’ll light us up a cigarette.
And we can drown in our own pollution
Of thoughts and smoke.
When you’re not ready to be aware of it,
But the truth,
When you need to acknowledge it,
There’s a place in hell,
For people like you and me.
My uncertainty for another
Is yours towards me.
Because of it, I’m able to understand
Why you feel the way you do
Or don’t feel the way I do.