Don’t ask me how I feel about you,
Because the answer is the same.
I honestly don’t know.
I know that the way I view your personality
Has changed over the years,
Which makes it confusing for me to figure out my feelings.
I don’t think I’ll ever love myself wholeheartedly,
Because if I did, I would have accepted your love.
I never think I deserve that kind of admiration.
Maybe that’s why I can only chase behind those
Who can love me less than I do.
Don’t ask me if there’s any hope,
Because the answer is still the same.
I hope you’ll find someone better
Who can love you the way you deserve to be loved.
I feel like,
I can never allow myself to be with you
Because I think too highly of you.
And I think too little of myself.
Take me for a night drive.
We’ll take turns with the playlist.
We’ll listen in silence.
I’ll light us up a cigarette.
And we can drown in our own pollution
Of thoughts and smoke.
I tell him my thoughts as they come,
He tells me don’t try to control it.
If I can punch him every time he misunderstood my intention,
Or every rhetorical question he’s answered,
It’ll be equal to the times he has interpreted me flawlessly.
And that’s probably why he’s special.
In case you’re all wondering like he did.
Restless, is the mind.
Priorities, yet not set.
Debts, continue to mount.
Unsure of what yet to come.
Words so desperate
to flow into
the ocean of a poem.
Confusion building up
in the faces of the voices
that reside within a crowded brain.
Brain already swollen
the pressure it contains.
Trapped inside an indecisive mind.
Trapped inside a mind that is not mine