We “functioned by pain”
And we both were getting high on that.
It was convenient…
No it wasn’t.
I was just dealt the right card at the right time.
The strength you had and the strength you gave me
Can only be in and be given by you.
And I should have been aware of all of this from the beginning,
But I can’t always be right,
And whenever I was right, it was because I’ve learnt this before…
The thing that put me off
Or the thing that delayed my full understanding is
My sudden extreme sense of hope.
I’ve never hoped about something the way I did towards anything related to you or us.
And it was either hope or complete awareness of our situation.
Now.. with realizing how incompatible we really are,
How we both can never be the pillar that can help the other to stand tall and confident,
How we can cause so much misery under the umbrella of I love you’s,
After I’ve become aware that this love story can never be repeated
With you (again) or anyone else.
The hope I had that our story has not yet ended cease to exist.
The hope that I could find someone that could make me feel the way you did is no longer alive.
I’ve buried it, said my prayers, and now I grieve,
With a satisfied heart still beating and moving on…