Dear me,

To the beautifully damaged,

Feel the pain.

Don’t cast it away.

Don’t deny what you’ve been through.

Welcome it all.

Accept it with an open soul.

Find peace with not enjoying that kind of happiness again.

Find peace with the sadness that comes after.

Find comfort within the mistakes you’ve said you’ll never repeat,

Find hope within the new ones.

Don’t hurt your mind with your overthinking,

Don’t hurt your soul with guilt and regret.

Don’t resort to physical pain by taking away your body’s innocence as a distraction from the heavy pain you feel in your chest.

Give yourself some time to grieve.

Be patient

Take care of yourself

And some day you’ll love yourself again.

May or may not be a glitch.

That’s why.

That’s why it’s difficult to pull away from your strings.

It isn’t simple love or too much of it

Or that I got used to the idea of you.

Something within me acknowledges the weight of your actions,

When I lacked expectations and hope,

And your efforts inspired me to believe in something greater than my circumstances..

I may slip from my own sweat, but i’ll take accountability.

Something inside of me broke

As I pushed myself beyond my limits

For a cause

that wasn’t my own

And that, my friend, is the worst way

To do yourself an injustice.

So find your own purpose,

And walk down that path,

The rest will follow.

I believe I am cursed with a rewind button.

Why am I confused all over again? It is as if I am destined to repeat history with every person I meet. My intention is not to play tug of war with your emotions. So, I think, I’d rather be quiet and keep my feelings to myself. If our story has not ended, and if I was committed to go past the obstacles I have in mind, then that time will come but far away in the future. For now, I am thankful you’ve allowed me to stay by your side.

Son (3)

Dear son,

Patience can be tough.

It can be so fucking hard. 

Excuse your mother’s choice of words.

But you’ll see. 

You’ll curse patience.

And anything that stands 

Between you and what you desire.

But patience,

My son,

Will help you become wiser.

But you don’t care about being wise,

Do you?

Not at the beginning.

Patience, my son. 

Will help you appreciate whatever it is 

That you wanted or needed in the first place.

You won’t understand the value

Of this trait

Unless you go through shit yourself.

Try it one time

With something that is worth your waiting

And tell me.. 

Tell me then how fulfilling it feels. 

Son (2)

Son.

Your mother needs you right now.

She needs to stroke your hair,

Hold your face,

Wraps you within her embrace,

Hear you call her name,

See you smile and act all silly.

She just needs you, son.

She needs you so she can love again.

She needs to feel that kind of affection

She wants to understand love, son.

Unconditional kind of love.

She needs to feel warm again.

She needs to feel.

Please. Son. 

Find your mother.

She is waiting for your call.

Incomplete letter.

To the girl who lived before she knew what is life,

To the girl who died and still is breathing and heart still beating,

To the girl who was reborn into a ghost,

To the ghost who was haunted by life and its beings,

To the ghost who was present but did not exist,

To the ghost who taught itself how humans lived,

To the ghost who possessed a human needing of company,

To the human who finally lived, but followed the darkest paths,

To the human who found light and reached out to it,

To the human’s soul who left its host to put it on standby to repent,

To the soul who was thirsty for the human’s body again,

To the soul who started to lose sight of the light and the dark,

To the soul who ended up blind for wanting to see again,

To the human who wrapped the soul, but after it was too late,

To the human who thought it could be the soul’s shades,

To the human who wanted to believe in miracles for once,

To the human who caught the disease of the Blurred Vision,

To the human who is begging to see  clearly again,

To the human who wants to die before its time,

To the human who forgot the girl who died 

Within its soul, who was a ghost, who was that girl.