I miss the feeling of being in love.

What I once found fulfilling

And had me melt like

Our cheesy comments,

Now feels so foreign and strange.

Do emotions just blind us completely?

Not in a way where everything seems dark

And you cannot see.

But in a way where there’s too much light

And you look the other way

Or end up closing your eyes.

As if these intense emotions are there

To amplify and hype up anything

That could be good into beautiful .

And once that light dims,

Your eyes adjust and start to see clearer.

And what once took your breath away,

Now, is extraordinarily ordinary.

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Dear Twinnee,

I hope we can be friends again. You may not believe it, but I’ve never wanted us to drift apart like this. I understand you blame me for so many things, and I’m sorry my apologies wont be enough to make up for anything. I know checking up on you would be selfish of me. But, I hope when we meet and hang out, we can still be friends again.

Sincerely

“Hello darkness my old friend..” Hello depression. Hello stress.

I thought visiting their graves was enough,

Exchanging thoughts and breathing the same air, for a while.

Then leaving for a more hopeful destination.

But my visits have been more frequent recently,

I thought I’d stop coming a long time ago.

And this weekend, I found an invitation as clear as daylight.

I should have never showed up.

But here I am.

Facing them, drawn to them, again.

Feeding on my weak heart.

Telling me to dig them up from the ground.

Promising me what I couldn’t achieve yet, alone.

Promising me again, that I needed them.

And I’m tempted to give in.

But the last time I did that, it didn’t turn out well.

And the recovery was painful.

So I stand there, silently crying,

Waiting,

Searching for the strength within me

To pull me away from that cemetery

To get over the dead.

To make peace with my living self.

I stand there trembling.

Afraid to let go.

Afraid to be alone.